Author: ejamienyc

OK actually – we heard that song the other day in the car with Mini!! I don’t think she was all that impressed, but I sang along in the front seat anyway. And yes, I still know every word. I own my love for cheesy pop music.  (Somewhere in New Jersey, Rick Hankey is having heart palpitations that he is related to me). 

Wanna know what I did again?
I registered. For St. Jude Marathon. Again.

Just like I have the last couple of years, and for various reasons (either nagging injury or just plain lack of discipline/training on my part) I’ve bailed.  But not this year. I think for the first time in a long time, my head is in the right place as far as nutrition and fitness. And the other day a memory popped up on FB that was from my last full marathon in 2014 – oh Lord THAT is a story in itself. Remind me to tell y’all later.

So, I’m signed up at Silver Fundraising Level ($1500). You can be sure I’ll be bugging you for at least $10.  I know I know 150 people willing to give me ten bucks right?!  Bill is considering the half.  One of my BFF’s from growing up is also doing the full.  I’ve got seven months to train, and get stronger. I know there’s a certain tall blond coach out there talking to herself in her head saying “and faster! you gotta get faster!” .. we’ll see if that part comes to fruition.

So enough about me. This race isn’t about me. It is about St. Jude. And about kids. And about Memphis. And what that hospital does for kids & their families, and the impact that hospital has on that town. I’m not sure I’ll be able to do it justice with words on a blog, but give me a few days and I’ll take a stab at it.

In the meantime, all of you out there are the ones who have to help hold me accountable. Don’t let me bail.

And of course, feel free to start donating.

How about a quick review of yesterday?  Because, fourtwenty.

Woke up to more rain, so any fascinating plans of yard mowing were out the window.

Moving on to the next task, taking the pup down to UT for Physical Therapy. Because, yes, we’re THAT family.  Husband alerts wife that the most direct route for the 15mile journey – Interstate 40 – is a complete parking lot. NOOOO. Because anyone who lives in our part of town knows that if the interstate is a parking lot, the only other two options for heading East will ALSO be parking lots. Thus, what should have been 45 minutes round trip became an hour and a half. For perspective, I could have been more than halfway to Nashville in that span of time.

When Finn and I did finally make it down to UT, it quickly became apparent the leash had been left sitting on the kitchen table. NOOOO. Dog mom sits in parking spot – already a half hour late – contemplating whether to leave dog in car, and go get a leash from vet, knowing chances are high I’d come back to a trashed car and traumatized dog, or of waddling in with dog while attempting to just hold on to his harness.  Dog mom went with option 2, and she looked incredibly cool trying to control Finn while not falling down. (and yes grammar trolls, I’m going back and forth between 1st and 3rd person for the sheer fun of it).

I finally make it back home, only to realize it is already 9:40. I was supposed to be on site for a board meeting at noon, but knowing I have a call that will take me until 11, and that it takes me FOREVER to get ready (even in dressy activewear!), it is clear I have to bail on attending said meeting in person.

As I sit dialed into my noon call, the doorbell rings.  I’m at my desk with a giant blue towel wrapped around my head. Do I ignore doorbell, even though I know it’s the guy coming to give an estimate on the deck? He’s EARLY.  Thirty minutes early, and husband is not yet home. As I try to explain to the deck guy from beneath my large blue headpiece that I’m on a call and my husband will be home shortly and I’m sorry I can’t help him, all the while my fellow board members are chattering from my phone, it occurs to me just how genius the mute button is.

The next thing I know it is time to go get Eileen. The house is a wreck, laundry everywhere, dog tumbleweeds, all that good stuff.  In my head I’m stressing out because can I manage to get Eileen, take her to the dentist, then go pick up Finn, and make it home before midnight?

Funny how that works. As I was pulling into school, developing my logistics plan in my head, I decide to listen to the voicemail the dentist had left me the day before as an appointment reminder.  I’m listening to this message at 2:52pm. And she mentions Eileen’s 3pm appointment. Wait. No. It’s at 3:30. I have it written down and it is on two electronic calendars as 3:30. So I call to ask forgiveness and is it ok if we get there by 3:15.

Not so much. You see, much like airlines, the dentist has patients overbooked. I’m sure this is due to the amount of air-headed people like myself that forget, late cancel, and whatever else comes along.  So, in the end, I reschedule. My latest tattoo is the time and date of said rescheduled appointment.  But honestly, in this case, it was good, since I knew we still had to go get the dog and back home. And even better, this time I had the least safely tucked away in my purse!

Ok, dog reclaimed. In car heading back home. I offer Starbucks to Eileen, mainly because I need an afternoon pick me up (and Sarah T. if you’re reading this, I got ice coffee with almond milk!).  Eileen does a back flip while in the back seat because OMG CAN SHE GET THE UNICORN DRINK? I had heard inklings of this drink, so I was not at all surprised by her request.

Y’ALL. OMG. This drink! Ok, so we go to SBX in Bearden. They’re sold out. SOLD OUT? Huh? Ok, no biggie.  Since we kind of have free time, I offer to take Eileen to the SBX in Turkey Creek, which of course results in a 2nd backseat back flip. While en route, I realize we need to run home first to help our neighbor with something, but promise we’ll go back out. (anyone who knows me knows that this is NOT my norm, but for whatever reason, I’m feeling generous).  So even though it is smack in the middle of 5pm traffic, we head back out to Turkey Creek (for those of you not familiar with Turkey Creek, it is 2mile strip of retail and traffic hell).

The first thing that should have tipped me off was the empty drive through. Was this the apocolypse? Have you EVER seen an empty drive-through at a SBX? We roll up, and you guessed it, they’re sold out. I’m floored.

Woman in speaker:  we’re completely sold out! I’m sorry! But, if you go to the SBX inside of Target, they still have the stuff to make the drink!

Me: Oh ok! Do you know how much longer the drink will be around? 

Woman in Speaker:  Well we think until 4/23, but that could cha…

DIFFERENT (angry) woman in speaker: SBX Corporate has SO dropped the ball on this!  They tell us nothing and didn’t send us enough supplies!

At that point I’m so baffled that two women are coming out of the speaker I don’t really process the rant about corporate. How’d they DO that?

So yes, off we go to the SBX inside of Target. Where there is a line. The two tweens and their mom in front of us – getting the Unicorn. The two 16/17ish BOYS behind us, getting the Unicorn. The woman in her early 20s, getting the Unicorn. And all of us had been sent to Target by the SBX with angry speaker woman. (so this makes me wonder if the stores hate each other and play tricks on each other.  like maybe the other store HAD all the stuff for Unicorns but didn’t want to have to keep making them, so they just send everyone to the Target one?)

We finally had success. We could rest easy.  Of course as I opened my instagram account to share with the world this fascinating drink, my feed was full of tweens and unicorn drinks! SBX must be rolling in pink dollars today.

The best part of the day though, it was our anniversary! Five years and I haven’t driven Bill insane (yet). So after all the shenanigans… we went out for dinner and drinks. We ran into some friends and got to catch up with them, and then we just got to hang out and be us.  Wine, beer, sports and food. I don’t think there’s a more perfect way for the two of us to have spent that five year mark.

but wait.. there’s more…

You didn’t think the day’s adventures were over just because we made it to dinner did you!?  We got home to find black pieces of plastic all over the floor – let me remind you this was after two days of camp and/or PT for the pups! – what in the world? A glasses case. Of course. because what dog isn’t attracted to a glasses case. Where in the world did Finn get it?  And what did I just step on? Oh, well of COURSE, the glasses themselves. Minus a lens and half the frame.

But don’t fret. I found the glass. No stomach linings were harmed during this post.

And with that, I put myself to bed.

 

 

I honestly have no idea the last time I drove a go-kart. Probably back in early high school when we frequented the Putt-Putt on Summer Ave in Memphis Bartlett.  But today – oh yes – there were go-karts. Even better, they were INDOOR. Inside of an old Kroger (seems to me a genius idea to do with a giant space like an old grocery store… so why oh why did I not think of it first)?

We had attempted this place during Spring Break, which of course was a #fail since 95% of our third of the state was on the same break. Or so we thought. After today we realized that this place has regulars. Like Norm at Cheers. Or for that matter, like me at Aubrey’s. A gang of scraggly guys, all ages and shapes, and all in major need of a shower and shave. I’m somewhat surprised these guys didn’t drive right in in their own go-karts, vanity plates and all. This place full on-races, qualifying and grand-prix and possibly their own Winston Cup.

Oh – “this place” is called Veloce. Don’t ask me how to pronounce it.

Our little totaled four girls ages nine and ten, and two boys ages seven and eight. All super experienced drivers. Plus me, another mom and a super-tall dad.

There were kid cars maxing out at 25mph, and adult cars maxing out at 50mph.  Eileen actually qualified for the adult kart since she’s part giraffe, but no way would I let her in on that 50mph track!

Once we’d paid up (just one kidney each), the race track guy instructed the kids to go put on clean head socks. I look at fellow parentals utterly confused, just as the children bolt over to the shelf of clean head socks.  How the hell do these kids know what a head sock is?! And why do they know where they are and how to put them on? Before I can finish being baffled, the kids have fastened on their helmets over their clean head socks and are strapped into their assigned kart.  These are the moments when I question who has allowed me to keep this small human alive.

And then they were off, Eileen leading the charge. And they totally went for it! It was hilarious. So as they were racing, it was the adults turn to suit up! Thank goodness the kids had demonstrated how to use this head sock.

The hilarious thing about this picture ^^ is that fellow dad Dave and I have known each other since we were 18, having met at COLLEGE ORIENTATION the summer before we started our Freshman year. If you had told our 18year old selves that 20+ years later, our girls would be best friends and we’d be at a race track putting on head socks, we’d have laughed in your face and returned to our keg stands.

For the record, I am not a fan of a head sock. I now have even more respect for Danica Patrick, as these things are itchy, smelly, and make one’s whole head prickle with sweat. I’m also leery of how clean (or not) this thing was.

The kids wrapped up and were shouting with glee and ohmygawdthatwassoooawesome.  I, of course, was hollering at Eileen through my muzzle of a helmet + headsock to come get my phone because all of this had to be documented. If ever there was an adventure in activewear, this would be it. Just in the knick of time she got said phone and scooted out of the way just before I would have smacked into her shin.  I was all excited to be first. I was gonna ROCK this.

Or, not.

I may mimic Ms. Patrick when I’m out on I-40 speeding past all the mini-vans, but apparently not so much when on an actual racetrack.  I started first, and ended last. In fact, my time was only :04 faster than Eileen’s… and her car was 25mph slower than mine.

But who cares? It was so much stinkin fun! It was hilarious. I spun out twice, once on accident and then on purpose because it was so fun. Dave and Michele left me in their dust, and I think once I almost killed Dave when I stopped short and he had to swerve around me as he was lapping me.  My whole face shield thing started steaming up bc I was laughing and breathing so hard through that head sock I was creating a sauna in my head.

When it was all said and done, we had seven laps of epic fun. I highly recommend go-karts for a stress reliever. Who needs to be an adult when you’re on a race track? And if you need a buddy, I still have two rounds left on my ticket.  Wear your active wear.

And if you watch and don’t blink, you’ll see Eileen whiz by and wave.